Sunday, September 28, 2014

What is Truth?

"I feel sad."
 "I don't believe you."
 "Quit accusing me!"
 "I'm not accusing you.  I'm just not believing you."
 "Well, when I think about what happened, I feel sad."
 "And, I still don't believe you."
 "Well, to heck with you.  Now I'm mad."  (This is the PG version).
What's going on here?  Emotions and beliefs are really inarguable.  You can't say someone doesn't feel some way, and you can't tell someone they don't believe what they believe.  These are called "inarguable truths".  Both sides of this conversation are inarguable.  The feeling of sadness on the one side and the "not believing you" on the other are both truth.

Perhaps then, a more integrated way for the conversation to go would have been:
"I feel sad."
"I don't believe you." 
"I get it.  You don't believe me.  And, I feel sad.  Both are true."
"Yes, they are."

End of story.

Am I Listening?

A while back, someone said to me, “Wow, Vince, you’re such a good listener!”  It made me wonder what it’s like to be a bad listener!  So, I ...