Monday, December 31, 2012

What will I let go?

At yoga earlier today my drill sargeant-turned-choreographer-yogi said... "To add something new or different in your life, you must first let go of something in order to create space for the new."  He admonished that the time-tested swift kick in the butt may not be the best path.

My first "letting go" thought was "butter"... but that's just not realistic.  Butter is simply the essence of life.  It signifies free will and choice.  Butter is all about youthful abandon and carefree living.  It is sweet and salty and everything good all wrapped up in one. 

And then I thought that perhaps our instructor was calling us to a slightly deeper level.  But as I tried to go deeper I kept coming back to butter.  Or more significantly, what butter means to me. 

On reflection, I see that I have clearly over-empowered butter in my life.  I make it mean something more than what it is.  I create a story around butter that my life would be worth less without it.  But the truth is I have freedom of choice.  I live my life in the ease and flow.  I work hard and play well.  Perhaps, it might be possible to have all that and let go of butter.  Just, perhaps.

Sunday, December 30, 2012

Just do what I say!

How often do I just want to tell someone what I think they should do?  And that they should just do it!  And, how often do I do what others tell me what they think I should do?  Rarely, if ever.

So, when someone feels compelled to give me some unsolicited advice, I ask them... "So, what experience have you had in your life that compels you to give me that advice?"  And, that's when the train stops and I get to hear from their story as opposed to hearing their view of mine.

I also know that I am sharing from my own life experience when I am speaking in the first person, past tense... "When that thing happened, I learned..."... and I know that I am slipping into giving advice when I am speaking from the second person, present tense... "Here's what you oughta do... now." 

Not that there's anything wrong with giving advice.  I just haven't found unsolicited advice all that helpful in my life. 

So, the next time someone starts giving you unwanted advice, here's what you oughta do...



Am I Listening?

A while back, someone said to me, “Wow, Vince, you’re such a good listener!”  It made me wonder what it’s like to be a bad listener!  So, I ...